SOL Post 16	12/15/97
SOL Post 15	11/27/97
SOL Post 14	11/15/97

S.O.L. POST

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VOLUME 15 - HTTP://USERS.AOL.COM/MSTANON/ - TURKEY DAY 1997
FORMERLY THE MSTIES ANONYMOUS NEWSLETTER: NEWS FOR THE OBSCURE CONVERGENCE
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SERVO SENSES MIKE'S GROWING IMPATIENCE WITH NEWSPAPER GAG!

In This Issue

From the Poobah
"Turkey Day: You Have 24 Hours to Live!" by novas@ix.netcom.com
"Jenny for Your Thoughts" by S364128@urgrgcc.edu
"Words of Warning and Other Stuff" by FlamingHat@aol.com
"Tom's MST3K Memories" by gherity@freenet.msp.mn.us
December MST3K Schedule on SFC
Classifieds 3000
Disclaimers

From the Poobah

Happy Turkey Day, everyone, and welcome to this bonus issue of the SOL Post! I hope you're surviving the Star Wars part of Sci-Fi's "Thanksgiving Marathon." I just played 321 Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and I'm getting ready to pop in 701T Night of the Blood Beast. I hope that your holiday is as enjoyable as can be! A full day of MST3K... who can complain?
And while you're thinking about MST3K, be sure to play the new game of Jeopardy!-esque MST3K Trivia on the MSTies Anonymous Home Page. If you're having problems logging in, please e-mail me and request your case-sensitive user ID and password. Round 1 will go on for the rest of the year, immediately followed by Round 2 in January. A final, weeklong question will wrap up the first game and a Rhino tape of MST3K will be awarded to the winner. Play! Have fun!
One last thing... I wouldn't go holiday shopping tomorrow if I were you.

"Turkey Day: You Have 24 Hours to Live!" by novas@ix.netcom.com

All right... time for some writing, eh?

SO WHAT'S UP FELLOW MSTies???

Okay, so what's coming up??? That's right, Turkey Day!
Wassat mean???
Lots of food, you name it, we got our turkey, our potato salad, our squash, our hotdogs, and peanuts, marshmallows and gyros!!! You name it buddy, we got it!!!

Hmmm... what else makes this Thanksgiving so great???

The sweet smell of dew on a fresh cold morning...
The warm loving hugs you get from the family members you haven't seen, and don't care to see every other Thanksgiving?
The 1974 Summer Olympics, when the beautiful Tonya Harding scored 93 whopping points for the Scandinavian All-Star Foosball Team?
Oh yes Thanksgiving... *sigh*

What will I be doing on my Thanksgiving???
Watching the great NYC parade??? Nope.
Sneaking away to make out with the neighbor's hot daughter??? Nope.
Waking up at 8 am EST and turning to the Sci-Fi Channel to catch the first of eight MST3K Episodes? HELL YEAH!!!

So that's right, MSTies across the nation and beyond!!!
While you slice and dice and tear your God forsaken turkeys to pieces, remember to watch the new and improved MST3K Turk-A-Thon only on the Sci-Fi Channel!!!

Anyway this has been Novas a.k.a. Novas2001 speaking and signing off!!!
THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT, SEATTLE!!!
YOU'VE BEEN GREAT!!!
"Stop, I'm Ted Nelson."

"Jenny for Your Thoughts" by S364128@urgrgcc.edu

Okay, I first want talk about a rumor I heard on line. I heard that possibility of a Season 8 or 9 cliffhanger. In this cliffhanger, the old, former MST members (Joel, Trace, and Frank) would reappear. I must admit this is a nice thought but I doubt it will happen. Why? Well for a lot of reasons.

1. Time. The west-former MST members now have lives and projects of their own. The reason they left MST3K was to get these projects done. They might not have time to for all them get together. I sometimes have trouble getting my friend and me together for a weekend. Plus I doubt that they would drop their projects to come back.
2. What they would do. Even if they were able to get together what would people do? Who would do what? How would they explain the history of MST3K and these people and why there coming back in those short host segments? There are some MSTies who have no clue who Joel or TV's Frank are. Who can explain something in such short period of time? Plus they would have also added in a story of the old characters interacting with the new characters. (I would just love see Joel and Mike talking and getting along so this war about who's better would die.) Just have these old characters to show up and leave would be pointless.
3. Jackals. Okay, there are certain people on line who rip on one MST person or character just because they replace someone or did something. (Like when Pearl replaced Dr. F. or Mike replaced Joel.) I call these people jackals and would talk about them in another article. Can you imagine the feeding frenzy they would have if the old characters got together with the new ones? It wouldn't be an historical event to them; it would be reason to complain and to nit-pick. Everything that would be said or done would be judged and criticized by the jackals. Who said what and what they did would give them reason to complain. I shudder when I think these jackals making this happy occasion into one of fighting. Trust me it has happen before and it would happen again.

"Words of Warning and Other Stuff" by FlamingHat@aol.com

Well, as you may have already heard, Turkey Day is here. It means food, family you never knew you had, and, most importantly, an MST3K marathon.
Yes, Turkey Day. Pearl will probably be eating the standard turkey, mashed potatoes, etc., Bobo will be eating bananas, Brain Guy will be eating... Wait, he doesn't have a body, so forget that... the nanites will be eating some type of microscopic food, and Mike and the 'Bots get some of that crap Gypsy makes. Nothing special or laughter causing, like MST3K should be. In my opinion, Turkey Day is way over-rated.
So, instead of babbling on about that, I'll write something worth reading: a warning. It's time the world knew about the Frad-Stols.
I'm sure you're wondering where this is all coming from, but it doesn't really matter. The point is, Frad-Stols are evil little interdimensional creatures that can kill your day with one battle cry of "EEEEAAAAWWWWWWWWW!!!" and a blast of energy from their visors. They are mindless little guys, controlled by the immortal lord Machos Gumbros, from his domain off in the realm of Sphuos. Frad-Stol eggs are often mistaken for large grapes, and when people find and peel these grapes, more Frad-Stols are unleashed unto an unaware public, to destroy buildings, people, and an occasional beaver.
How can you prevent a Frad-Stol attack, you may be wondering? Well, first off, never peel giant grapes. Other than that, just keep a battleaxe around the house, so you can smash one to a steaming pulp if one breaks into your home. Do that, and you should be pretty safe.
The major Frad-Stol fanatic I know, FradStol@aol.com, could give you much more information than I. Contact him anytime, and if you ask about Frad-Stols and give him a couple warez site addresses, he should be fairly helpful. I am in no way promoting his site, because I personally think FradStol@aol.com is a lifeless loser, but you may want to check it out so you know what a Frad-Stol looks like, and so you can know what's shooting at you if one ever approaches your door.
The following is a short essay written by FradStol@aol.com, about one of his personal experiences with a Frad-Stol by the name of Puntos Ventos:

"He jumped! He landed as a Frad-Stol! He died because a laser beam shot him! Out of the beam shooter! He was dead!!! It was because of the Frad-Stol!!! Machos Gumbros made him! He made the Frad-Stol! Now he was dead, and it was because of Machos Gumbros!!! AUGH!!! But I don't care! I'm writing a story here, people! Hey! Listen to my story! Oh, good. A Frad-Stol is a grape and you peel it. It turns into a Frad-Stol because you peel it. A Frad-Stol will kill you and me. We'd better start running from these Frad-Stols because we might die! THE END."

He claims to have been in a state of shock when he wrote that, but I think he was just drunk. In any case, I just shoved that in here because it's an example of Frad-Stol information, though maybe not the best.
So, happy Turkey Day, and remember: do not wait for revolving doors, for revolving doors will wait for YOU.

"Tom's MST3K Memories" by gherity@freenet.msp.mn.us

Ahhh, another Turkey Day has arrived. I begin choking on a turkey leg as a laugh is so perfectly launched by the laser accurate wit of Tom Servo, and I realize: my past is tied to the SOL...

I was brought over in year 1 of the series. (Yes the KTMA age...) I loved how Joel executed his victims in efficiency. I slipped away when I could not see 3 years of the series due to the fact that MST3K was on a station my cable system did not carry. The Otaku virus infected me as a result... After seeing my first dose of MST3K on Comedy Central, I have stuck faithfully ever since. But now my immortal soul is torn, between the east... and the stars... But as long as Mike fights the forces of madness on the Sci-Fi Channel (who butcher anime like it's raw meat...), I will watch.

-Thomas "Sailor Minneapolis" G.
-Faithful follower for 2 years. (XBand, rest in peace...)
-MSTie 4-Life!

December MST3K Schedule on SFC

(All times Eastern and tentative)

Airdate	Time	###	Episode
12/06	5:00 pm	822	Overdrawn at the Memory Bank
12/06	11:00 pm	822	Overdrawn at the Memory Bank
12/13	5:00 pm	816	Prince of Space
12/13	11:00 pm	816	Prince of Space
12/20	5:00 pm	817	Horror of Party Beach
12/20	11:00 pm	817	Horror of Party Beach
12/27	5:00 pm	818	Devil Doll
12/27	11:00 pm	818	Devil Doll

Classifieds 3000

servo99@hotmail.com writes:
I am looking for people to trade or buy MST3K tapes from. I "currently" have episodes 101, 102, 103, 301, 302, 303, 304, 309, 512, 813, 814, 815, 818, and 821. I used to have a lot more, but they were stolen (long story). I am now in the process of rebuilding my collection, and anyone who would like to help can e-mail me at servo99@hotmail.com. I am willing to trade any of the episodes I have listed (none of them are Rhino and I won't trade The Movie). Most of my episodes are recorded in LP a few in SLP. If anyone would like to buy a tape from me (but I don't know why), just e-mail me about it. I'd prefer traders though; it seems silly to charge for 'em.

Disclaimers

Mystery Science Theater 3000, its characters and situations are copyright 1997 Best Brains, Inc. This publication is not meant to infringe on any copyrights held by Best Brains, the Sci-Fi Channel, or their employees.

© MCMXCVII MSTies Anonymous
The Poobah mstanon@msties.com
Jet Jaguar kret0419@blue.UnivNorthCo.edu
Zen Psycho Cool6000@juno.com

"You're watching the MST3K Turkey Day Marathon..."

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